«روانشناسی دروغ»
ابتدا باید مرز باریک دروغ گویی را از خالی بندی یا لاف زدن که خود نیز درواقع نوعی دروغگویی است ، متمایز کرد.
اگر کسی از شما بپرسد کجا بودین؟ و به‌جای اینکه بگید با دوستانم پارک بودم بگویید رفته بودم کتابخانه!این مصداق دقیق دروغگویی است.اما اگر کسی در مورد داشتن یک منزل مجلل یا داشتن یک خودرو گران قیمت یا مسافرت خارجی که هرگز وجود نداشته برایتان حرف میزند، مصداق خالی بندی و لاف زدن است،زهرچند که این هم نوعی از دروغگویی است ولی در این نوشتار به موضوع دروغگویی درروابط بین فردی و خانوادگی می‌پردازم که :
چرا ما در یک رابطه دروغ می‌گوییم؟
چرا ما در یک رابطه راست نمی‌گوییم؟
چرا فرزندان و همسرمان به دروغ متوسل می‌شوند؟
یکی از ارکان اساسی در یک رابطه احساس “امنیت” است.بنابراین در رویارویی با اتفاقات و موقعیت‌ها، ابتدا این امنیت را ارزیابی می‌کنیم: اگر راست بگم تو تحمل شنیدن راست گفتن مرا داری؟ اگر من راست بگم امنیت رابطه ما برقرار خواهد ماند؟ یا اگر راست بگم به من آسیبی نخواهد رسید؟اگر راست بگم من زیان نخواهم کرد؟بنابراین دروغ واکنشی است برای ایمن نگه داشتن یک رابطه است.
رابطه نابرابر و مبتنی براحساس ” ترس” افراد را وادار به دروغگویی و یا راست نگفتن می‌کند.ترس از آسیب ، تحقیر، سرزنش ، تخریب و توهین. معمولا افراد میگویند:” ترسیدم” اگه راستشو بگویم قشقرق به بپا کند!” ترسیدم” نمره ام رو به مامان بگم منو دعوا کنه!
” ترسیدم” بگم بعدا با من تلافی کنه!
” ترسیدم” بگم این اشتباه رو من کردم اخراجم کنه!
” ترسیدم” بگم با اون دوستم بودم منو بزنه!
” ترسیدم” بگم که کجا بودم با من قهر کنه!
بنابراین احساس “عدم امنیت” در یک رابطه اصلی ترین انگیزه برای “عدم صداقت” افراد است.
پس راست نگفتن براحساس ترس از”زیان” مبتنی است یعنی فردی تجربه کرده که اگر مطلبی درست و واقع را به همسر، پدرو مادرش یا دوست وهمکارش بگوید، بعدا درجمع یا موقعیتی خاص مورد سرزنش و رسوایی و تحقیر قرارمی گیرد وازآن برعلیه خودش استفاده می کنند. بنابراین سعی می‌کند که از راست گفتن پرهیز کند.
بعضی از والدین با گفتن این مطلب که اگر بفهمم نمره کم گرفتی یا بفهمم با فلان دوستت بودی یا بفهمم که با همسرت به مشکل خوردی یا دعوا کردی من دق میکنم، می میرم، ازت راضی نیستم ! وبه صورت نا خودآگاه به طرف مقابل میگویند لطفا به من راست نگو من طاقتشو ندارم!
بنابراین هرچقدرافراد در روابط اساسی خود مانند رابطه والدی و همسری ویا شغلی، هنر و مهارت گفتگو وارتباط بین فردی بهتری داشته باشند، روابط صادقانه ترو شفاف تری راتجربه خواهند کرد.
محمد طلوع( پزشک و روانشناس)
I just couldn’t leave your web site prior to suggesting that I really enjoyed the standard info an individual supply to your guests? Is going to be again continuously in order to inspect new posts
It sounds like you’re creating problems yourself by defining this as such a comprehensive, almost unknowable problem. Isn’t that self-defeating?
Like the way you’ve outlined things. Easy to follow. Not cluttered.
A friend of mine advised me to review this site. And yes. it has some useful pieces of info and I enjoyed reading it.
You appear to know so much about this, and I see you’re a published author. Thanks
OK, you outline what is a big issue. But, can’t we develop more answers in the private sector?
Greetings, have tried to subscribe to this websites rss feed but I am having a bit of a problem. Can anyone kindly tell me what to do?’
I know this is not exactly on topic, but i have a blog using the blogengine platform as well and i’m having issues with my comments displaying. is there a setting i am forgetting? maybe you could help me out? thank you.
Some truly nice stuff on this website , I like it.
We’re developing a conference, and it looks like you would be a great speaker.
Glad to be one of many visitants on this amazing site : D.
Thank you pertaining to sharing the following great subject matter on your website. I ran into it on google. I am going to check to come back after you publish additional aricles.
Makes sense to me.
of course like your web-site however you have to check the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very troublesome to tell the reality then again I will surely come back again.
Our communities really need to deal with this.
I concur with your conclusions and will eagerly look forward to your future updates. The usefulness and significance is overwhelming and has been invaluable to me!
Tips and tools you offer are so helpful to agencies in our community.
This is valuable stuff.In my opinion, if all website owners and bloggers developed their content they way you have, the internet will be a lot more useful than ever before.
Great post, keep up the good work, I hope you don’t mind but I’ve added on my blog roll.
This is really interesting, You’re a very skilled blogger. I have joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your great post. Also, I’ve shared your web site in my social networks!
My issues have been very similar, with my family. But, we made some different decisions. It’s complex.
Γεια χαρά σε όλους! Εδώ είμαστε πάλι, η ομάδα των ειδικών, για να βουτήξουμε σε ένα θέμα που καίει πολλούς παίκτες στην Ελλάδα: ποιές ξένες στοιχηματικές εταιρίες δέχονται τους παίκτες από την χώρα μας ελεύθερα, χωρίς VPN και γρήγορες πληρωμές; Έχουμε περάσει ώρες ατελείωτες δοκιμάζοντας διάφορες πλατφόρμες τζόγου, διαβάζοντας ψιλά γράμματα και μιλώντας με ομάδα υποστήριξης, για να σας δώσουμε την ξεκάθαρη εικόνα για το τι παίζει σε αυτές τις πλατφόρμες πραγματικά.
Τα online καζίνο αποτελούν σήμερα μια από τις πιο δημοφιλείς μορφές ψυχαγωγίας στην Ελλάδα. Η αγάπη των Ελλήνων παικτών για αυτή τη μορφή διασκέδασης μεγαλώνει συνεχώς, και μαζί με αυτή την αύξηση, πολλαπλασιάζονται και οι επιλογές σε διαδικτυακά καζίνο. Αν θέλεις να βρεις τα καλύτερα και πιο ασφαλή καζίνο για να παίξεις, είναι σημαντικό να ξέρεις πώς να ξεχωρίζεις τις αξιόπιστες πλατφόρμες από τις υπόλοιπες. Στο παρακάτω άρθρο θα βρεις χρήσιμες πληροφορίες και συμβουλές για να κάνεις την καλύτερη επιλογή και να απολαύσεις το παιχνίδι με ασφάλεια και διασκέδαση.
I like your style!
I think other website proprietors should take this web site as an model, very clean and great user pleasant style and design .
There is so much to try to understand
Our community leaders need to read this, and look at developing some of your recommendations.
Peculiar this blog is totaly unrelated to what I was searching for – – interesting to see you’re well indexed in the search engines.
Greetings! This is my first visit to your blog! We are a collection of volunteers and starting a new initiative in a community in the same niche. Your blog provided us beneficial information. You have done a wonderful job!
I am glad to be a visitor of this perfect blog !, appreciate it for this rare info!
I had fun reading this post. I want to see more on this subject.. Gives Thanks for writing this nice article.. Anyway, I’m going to subscribe to your rss and I wish you write great articles again soon.
You ma’am have a way with words. Thank you very much!
XN88 là một cổng game đổi thưởng và nhà cái trực tuyến mới thành lập (2025), cung cấp hơn 2.500 tựa game đa nền tảng, nổi bật với bảo mật mạnh, giao diện thân …
Very Interesting Information! Thank You For Thi Information!
I will share you blog with my sis.
The sketch is tasteful, your authored material stylish.
I would share your post with my sis.
Just a quick note to express my appreciation. Take care
I really believe you will do well in the future I appreciate everything you have added to my knowledge base.
Hi, possibly i’m being a little off topic here, but I was browsing your site and it looks stimulating. I’m writing a blog and trying to make it look neat, but everytime I touch it I mess something up. Did you design the blog yourself?
If most people wrote about this subject with the eloquence that you just did, I’m sure people would do much more than just read, they act. Great stuff here. Please keep it up.
You are not right. I am assured. I can prove it. Write to me in PM, we will talk.
Hey, I simply hopped over to your website by way of StumbleUpon. No longer one thing I’d normally learn, but I preferred your thoughts none the less. Thanks for making one thing worth reading.
Sweet blog! I found it while browsing on Yahoo News. Do you have any tips on how to get listed in Yahoo News? I’ve been trying for a while but I never seem to get there! Thank you
Please let us know when you plan to publish your book!
Hello, I think your blog might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your website in Chrome, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other than that, awesome blog!
of course like your web-site however you have to check the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very troublesome to tell the reality then again I will surely come back again.
Great write-up, I am a big believer in placing comments on sites to inform the blog writers know that they’ve added something advantageous to the world wide web!
I dont think Ive caught all the angles of this subject the way youve pointed them out. Youre a true star, a rock star man. Youve got so much to say and know so much about the subject that I think you should just teach a class about it
Hello there! I really enjoy reading your blog! If you keep making amazing posts like this I will come back every day to keep reading.
Some truly nice stuff on this website , I like it.
You are one talented writer thank you for the post.
Abnormal this put up is totaly unrelated to what I was searching google for, but it surely used to be listed at the first page. I suppose your doing one thing proper if Google likes you adequate to place you at the first page of a non similar search.
Nice Post. It’s really a very good article. I noticed all your important points. Thanks.
I favored your idea there, I tell you blogs are so helpful sometimes like looking into people’s private life’s and work.At times this world has too much information to grasp. Every new comment wonderful in its own right.
A good web site with interesting content, that’s what I need. Thank you for making this web site, and I will be visiting again. Do you do newsletters? I Can’t find it.
When are you going to post again? You really entertain me!
Thanks for posting this. Looking for these resources 😀
I was referred to this web site by my cousin. I’m not sure who has written this post, but you’ve really identified my problem. You’re wonderful! Thanks!
Advanced reading here!
Great post, keep up the good work, I hope you don’t mind but I’ve added on my blog roll.
nicee content keep writing
сайт kraken darknet
нажмите, чтобы подробнее kraken зайти
Only a smiling visitor here to share the love (:, btw outstanding style and design .
Nice post.Very useful info specifically the last part 🙂 Thank you and good luck.
Tips and tools you offer are so helpful to agencies in our community.
I would share your post with my sis.
перейти на сайт https://kra43-cc.at
веб-сайт kra41 cc